Title: Please, Mr. Panda
Author/Illustrator: Steve Antony
Published: Scholastic, 2014

Have you ever picked up a book and been totally surprised by a wonderful plot twist that you just DID NOT see coming? That was Please, Mr. Panda for me. We chose it in December’s Scholastic book order because the art was super-cute. And, full disclosure, it came with a squishy donut. And OMG, squishy everything is the best around here.

Ahem. Anyway, the book was delightfully surprising because of…wait for it…a lemur!

If you’ve been following along, you know that lemurs are kinda THE animal here at Chez Borst (OK, lemurs AND cats). Vivi has been obsessed with these adorable little primates since she was an adorable tiny primate herself.

The book Please, Mr. Panda tells the tale of the very polite Mr. Panda offering donuts to various black-and-white animals. (I really liked this choice, art-wise. It’s clever and neat to look at.) The animals he offers donuts to are not exactly…nice.

The penguin is all “Yeah, gimme some!”

The ostrich is all “OMG, go away!”

The skunk is all “Yeah, I’ll eat some donuts!”

The whale is all “I want all of them!”

(I’m seriously precising here.)

And Mr. Panda, being the polite fellow he is, decides that none of them asks kindly enough. So he keeps his donuts…until…

a lemur shows up!

The lemur is exceedingly polite! Mr. Panda realizes he’s found the recipient of his dozen donuts. The lemur happily chows down and Mr. Panda happily walks away. Turns out, he doesn’t like donuts anyway.

The book is so simple, but so sweet. We all FREAKED out when the lemur turned up. (And got a kick out of the fact that he was upside-down…hey, we don’t get out much. What can I say?)

If you’re looking for a great book about manners, kindness and…well…lemurs…then this is the one for you! Also: A++ for the art.

Vivi’s rating: I really liked the part where the lemur got everything. Will there be more lemurs in the future books? I certainly hope so. (We ordered some more Mr. Panda books from Scholastic. They are probably coming in sometime near the end of this month. Along with a *few* other books. Vivi’s poor teacher is getting some serious biceps from carrying our book orders out to us. We love, you, Ms. R!) 

Lily’s rating: Well, I just loved it. That’s all I have to say.

Yup. It’s a winner.

We had a birthday party for Lily on the weekend. It was lovely and we had so many of our nearest and dearest over to celebrate. At one point, my dear friend’s husband said, “Your kids definitely have a literary advantage.” He’s so polite. What dear Joseph MEANT by that was, “Holy crap, you have way too many books.”
But again, he’s far too kind to say that.
But he’s right.
We do have a LOT of books. You know how some families are into sports, and they have all kinds of sporty paraphernalia around? Well, we’re like that, but with books. We have a bookshelf in every single room (except the bathrooms) and we are constantly borrowing books/using gift cards for books/books, books, books.
One thing we went a *little* crazy with when Vivi was born was board books. We have a LOT of them. They were taking up a ton of shelf space on Lily’s bookshelf and she’s really past them at this point…so we did the big clear off. We put them into a giant Rubbermaid and kissed them goodbye. Not to give away! Let’s not be unreasonable, peeps. They’re going to live in our basement storage room (among a billion other Rubbermaid containers) until my kiddos have kiddos of their own.
It was weird. It was weird putting away such a big part of their little libraries for the past six years. It was weird knowing I likely wouldn’t see those books again for X number of years (where X equals the amount of time it will take for my girls to have kids). And knowing that maybe they would never go to a grand baby. Overall, unsettling.
But it was nice taking a stroll down memory lane. And so, because I want to share my wonderful board-book love with you, here are my top 20 board books, in no particular order:

1. Perfect Piggies – Sandra Boynton (she’s on this list a lot)
2. Oh No, George! – Chris Haughton
3. Goodnight, Gorilla – Peggy Rathmann
4. But Not the Hippopotamus – Sandra Boynton
5. Dear Zoo – Rod Campbell
6. A Color of His Own – Leo Lionni (this is also a picture book, but the board book version is sweet)
7. The Gruffalo – Julia Donaldson
8. Hippos Go Berserk – Sandra Boynton (told ya)
9. Goodnight Moon – Margaret Wise Brown
10. Doggies – Sandra Boynton
11. Chicka Chicka Boom Boom – Bill Martin Jr.
12. Where is Green Sheep? – Mem Fox
13. Grumpy Bird – Jeremy Tankard
14. AlphaBlock – Christopher Franceschelli
15. That’s Not My…series – Fiona Watt
16. Pat the Bunny – Dorothy Kunhardt
17. Ten Little Fingers and Ten Little Toes – Mem Fox
18. Huggy Kissy – Leslie Patricelli
19. Hey! Wake Up!- Sandra Boynton
20. You Are My Cupcake – Joyce Wan

Shall I go on? No? Please stop? OK. I will. For now. But for real, pick up one or all of those books. You will not be sorry!

Title: Sam and Dave Dig a Hole
Author: Mac Barnett
Illustrator: Jon Klassen
Published: Candlewick Press, 2014

We’ve talked here before about books that certain members of the family like and certain other family members…don’t feel as strongly about. Today’s book falls into that category: it’s OK, and I don’t DISLIKE it, but it’s not SUPER (although it IS super creepy…stay tuned for more).

Lily disagrees and really enjoys the story.

Sam and Dave Dig a Hole is written by the talented Mac Barnett and illustrated by the always awesome Jon Klassen. Lily immediately recognized the art style and said, “Hey! That’s the guy who did the I Want My Hat Back book!” She was enthused to read the book, especially when I reminded her that this dynamic duo penned/illustrated Triangle and Square, two books she adored this summer (as part of our ‘let’s borrow all the books from the library and see if they notice’ project).

So we read the story. It can be summarized thusly: 2 brothers (Sam and Dave) decide to dig a big hole in search of something spectacular.  Unbeknown to them, every time they dig in a new direction, they miss discovering a large jewel. They then fall asleep (due to exhaustion and lack of snacks) and their dog (who seems to be quite wise) digs a bit further. Sam and Dave fall through it and end up outside their grandfather’s house. They go in for a snack. A simple, kinda meh ending, right?

WRONG.

The house at the end (where they fall through and end up) is NOT the same as the house they started at. Want proof?

Prepare to have your mind BLOWN:

Oh, look! A nice apple tree. Grandpa must grow apples! How sweet.

Oh, look! A nice pear tree. Wait, Grandpa doesn’t grow pears! That’s not Mr. Whiskers! Where the hell are we, Sam?!

(Also: sorry my camera is potato-quality.)

So now I’m kinda freaked out. Where did you end up, Sam and Dave?! Will Grandpa have button eyes? Are you in the upside-down? WHERE ARE YOU?!

Ahem.

What works:

1. The illustrations are, of course, fantastic. The subtle glances the dog gives, both trying to point out the jewels and trying to point out that they ARE NOT IN THE SAME PLACE THEY STARTED are good…and creepy. Every page is lovely. Jon Klassen is a master. Although Dan Santat is my #1 art homie, Jon Klassen is top five.

2. The freaky ending. I did NOT see that coming. In fact, truth be told, I’ve owned this book for a while now and hadn’t noticed it until tonight. And now I’m so creeped out.

What isn’t my favourite:
1. The super-simple story. Lily thought it was hilarious that the boys kept missing the jewels – and this seemed to be a common kid-reaction on Goodreads (I like to see what the general populous thinks of a book before I weigh in). I found it kind of frustrating. What does that say about our personalities? Type-A, Type-B? Fun/no-fun (I’m the no-fun, naturally)? Without the super-freaky ending (which is subtle), the story just feels really basic. Kind of meh overall. When you realize that it’s actually Black Mirror-esque, it gets much stranger. I wonder how many people actually did as I did, and simply missed the subtle details because they were too busy reading the book to a kid, who likes the simplicity of the story.

LIly wanted me to add that she also really liked the cat character. Because, well, it’s a cat.*

So the book is interesting. Simple, but interesting right at the end. Chilling, even. Downright freaky, if you will.

I’m sleeping with the lights on tonight.

Lily: Let’s read it again!
Mama: The apples are pears! The apples are pears!

*The cat at the end is not the cat at the beginning. The dog knew everything. Always trust the wise-looking dog.

I’m not sure I’ve ever mentioned it here, but I’m a die-hard, #1 Babysitters Club fan. Like, for real, forever.  (Team Claudia, in case you’re wondering.) I read all the books up to number 60-something when I was a kid/past the time I should’ve been reading them. (In all fairness, I was reading a lot of complicated, interesting, age-appropriate stuff too. But the BSC habit dies hard.) Then, as I’ve become a full-fledged mama, I’ve downloaded and read a whole bunch more later in the series because…uh…when my girls get old enough…I’ll be able to tell them about the characters and…something, something.

Nah, I’m still a fan.

(Side note: do you know what happened to Mallory? Her story line got a bit weird later on! She ended up participating in this ‘students-teach-students’ kind of program at Stoneybrook Middle School – what school does this?- and, in true Mallory fashion, messed it up. Her cruel-but-kinda-accurate name was Spaz-Girl! She got hella depressed about school and decided to apply at a boarding school. And she was accepted there on a scholarship. Which is good, because she has eighty-billion siblings and I can’t see Mr. & Mrs. Pike being OK with forking over a crap-ton of money for ol’ Mal’s education. Anyway, then she went off to boarding school, never to be heard from again, except on one of the seventy-four summer vacations the BSC enjoyed over their two-year friendship).

Anyway, here’s what I love about the BSC:

1. The outfits. These are SO quintessentially eighties-early-nineties that it HURTS. Claudia dressed like it was Halloween every damn day, and no matter what kind of crazy nonsense she wore, it “would’ve looked insane on anyone else, but on Claudia the outfit just worked.” Did it, Ann M? Did it REALLY?
2. The timelines. OK, so you went to California, Hawaii, New York, summer camp, a trip across the USA, multiple Sea City visits and a few more New York and California trips just for kicks in TWO years? Dude, when did you go to school? There are SO many summer/spring/winter vacations over the course of the series. I think they literally just gave up when it came to making any sense of what happened when.
3. The wacky-near-impossible stories (especially the mysteries) intermixed with the super-boring, nothing really happens books.
4. The misunderstandings that could’ve been SO EASILY RESOLVED by talking to an adult (I’m looking at you, Claudia and the Great Search. If you thought you were adopted, C-Kish, why didn’t you ask your parents?)
5. The candy. The hiding of candy around Claudia’s room. Candy in general.
6. The fact that almost everyone’s dad was named John. It’s kind of weird, but true! Other than Watson, I think most of the dads were John.
7. The ghostwriters and their fairly obvious styles. They all TRIED to sound like the OG, Ann M. Martin, but their voices were quite distinct. No matter, I would’ve read the BSC written by Stephen King as long as it had a Claudia outfit description in it.

So I love the BSC. It’s in my blood, it’s in my past, it’s in my present, on my Kindle and, since Christmas, the graphic novels (illustrated by the ridiculously talented Raina Telgemeier) are on my shelf. Vivi has absconded with book 1 (Kristy’s Great Idea), but I’ve hidden The Truth About Stacey in my office for later reading.

I will read it and report back. All in the name of helping you, of course. Not because I love it dearly and am so happy to see Vivi as obsessed as I was.

Not at all. All for you.

Title: Santa Bruce
Author/Illustrator: Ryan T. Higgins
Published: Hyperion, 2018

Guys, how is it that Christmas is 13 days away? Less than TWO WEEKS! We’re finally TOTALLY ready. (I thought I was ready, then I remembered other people that I was going to see before the holiday…and we had to get a few gift cards for Vivi’s awesome teachers and…long story short, we were NOT done. But we are now!)

Anyway, we’ve been continuing our ‘let’s read about Christmas!’ tradition with this fantastic book: Santa Bruce! I told you I was going to hunt out all the other Bruce books, and I wasn’t kidding. I really like this one. Bruce’s surliness, his disdain for everyone and everything, the mice trying to persuade him to be Santa…it’s all good!

Here’s the story, in a nutshell:

Bruce normally skips Christmas by hibernating, but this year his family members (the mice and geese) want him to stay up. So he does. He is not exactly into the Christmas spirit, and he finds the weather nippy. So he wears long underwear and a hat (both red) and is immediately mistaken for the big man himself: Santa. With this case of mistaken identity comes a slew of forest animals and their holiday wishes. And then the forest animals’ parents, thanking Bruce for playing the role of St. Nick.

When everyone leaves his cave, Bruce decides to head to bed…but the mice step in and convince him to be Santa. He delivers gifts (wrapped boxes of crackers, actually) to all the forest critters. They all have an excellent Christmas and then celebrate with a big feast (that Bruce is forced to attend and generally doesn’t enjoy).

I know Bruce is surly. I know Christmas is all about being jolly. But dang it, I like the cut of his jib.

My kiddos know that Santa isn’t real. That is, that Santa is a concept and anyone can be Santa. Vivi kinda figured it out when she was two. I was wrapping gifts and planning a whole surprise for a friend who was having a tough year. Out of the blue, she turned to me and said, “Mama, you Santa?” and I decided, in that split second, to ruin childhood for my kid.

Kidding! I decided to explain that Santa is an idea and a spirit and anyone (anyone!) can be ‘him.’ And that yes, I was one of the many Santas she’d meet in her life. I know people who are die-hard pushers of “you must believe in Santa, dammit!” but it just didn’t feel right to me. I didn’t want to have to eventually admit to lying to my child, even if it was just about Santa. I also wanted her to understand that it was in her power to make other people’s lives better/happier/more comfortable. It wasn’t up to a random stranger to pop down a chimney one time a year and bring gifts – it was up to her to pick up the baton and get out there and help, darn it.

Ahem.

Anyway, it’s worked out rather well. Since she was two, we’ve really encouraged the giving part of Christmas. Give to the food bank. Give to homeless people. Give to kids who are sick in the hospital. Give of your time, your talent, your money – whatever it is, just give. And the happiness my girls have felt because of that…well, it’s pretty close to magic.

Mama’s review: 5 surly bears/5
Vivi’s review: “Bruce is so grumpy! I kind of love him.”
Lily’s review: “I can’t believe he gave them all crackers.”

Title: Bear Stays Up For Christmas
Author: Karma Wilson
Illustrator: Jane Chapman
Published: Scholastic, 2004

It’s official: I can start playing carols on the radio all day long! I can leave the Christmas tree lights on from dawn till dusk! I can force my family to join me in a carol sing. A pioneer carol sing, no less! Yes, it’s finally December and I am no longer considered crazy for my love of Christmas. Hooray!

To get the girls into the spirit of the season, I’ve been reading a bunch of really great picture books. Today’s is Bear Stays Up For Christmas and it’s adorable.

Bear has starred in other books as well, but this is definitely my favourite one. The basic premise is that Bear (sometimes called “the bear” and sometimes simply “Bear”) never stays up for Christmas. He’s always busy hibernating…until this year! His friends are bound and determined to keep him up and show him what Christmas is all about. So, despite his exhaustion, Bear sticks it out for his friends. They get a tree and decorate it. They have tasty foods. They sing carols. And then, after all his friends have dozed off, Bear makes some gifts of his own (and Santa shows up, unbeknownst to Bear).

The book is all in rhyme, which you know I love, and the art is simply fantastic.

The message is very sweet: it’s worth making sacrifices/staying up (when you should be hibernating) just to be with your friends. And Bear’s friends clearly adore him and just want to have him around for the big day. It’s all about love, friendship, and the real meaning of Christmas: being together with the people we love.

Mama’s review: 5/5 Christmas trees
Vivi’s review: “I really like the rabbit!”
Lily’s review:  “This book is great!”

Title: Hotel Bruce
Author/Illustrator: Ryan T. Higgins
Published: Scholastic, 2016

There’s something you should know about me: I’m a sucker for bear stories. I love them to an absurd degree. I’m also a sucker for grumpy animal stories. So when I found Bruce Hotel, a story about a grumpy bear, I was immediately enamored. And THEN I did a bit of research and found out that there are several more Bruce books…

Which are presently wrapped up under our Christmas tree. (Yes, I know it’s still November…but it’s ALMOST December, which means it’s high time for several Christmas trees!)

The girls loved Bruce Hotel. And why not? It’s hilarious! A quick recap? Don’t mind if I do!

The story starts with Bruce reluctantly accompanying his ‘kids’ (four Canada geese) south for the winter. The problem is, when they return they find that three mice have taken over their house and are now running a hotel! Bruce is not the type of bear to stand for a rodent invasion, so he boots the mice…but there are other animals to contend with.

Many other animals.

Suffice it to say, hilarity ensues and Bruce ends up finally losing his cool (he IS a bear, after all). He gets rid of ALL of his unwanted guests…only to have his four geese convince him to take the mice back in.

So he does. Oh, Bruce. You do have a sweet heart after all!

We purchased this at the school book fair on Friday…and we have read it about ten times since then. One thing I immediately realized is that the mice in Bruce Hotel are the same mice from Be Quiet! (Another really funny book.)

Our reviews? Here goes:

Jess: 9/10 bears
Vivi: “This book is hilarious!”
Lily: “I like the mice!”

Title: Thelma the Unicorn
Author/Illustrator: Aaron Blabey
Published: Scholastic, 2015

Many times, I buy books based on their reviews.

Occasionally, I hit up Chapters and take a look around the children’s section. Then something inevitably catches my eye and I *must* have it.

And then sometimes…just SOMETIMES…I end up buying a book for a silly reason. A frivolous reason. A reason that might include “it’s about a unicorn” and “the unicorn is pink” plus “the title is SPARKLY.”

I bought Thelma the Unicorn for the third reason. Obviously. Well, that and one other thing.

A few years ago, I wrote a book called Phoebe the Unicorn. I really loved it and so did an editor at a local publishing house. The issue we ran into was the art: she couldn’t figure out how to make it work. I was *kinda* heartbroken because it was as close as I’ve ever been to having a REAL publisher publish something I’ve written. So when I saw Thelma the Unicorn I felt I should support an author (and illustrator) who was able to get their unicorn to market. Makes sense, non?

Non?

Well, anyway, Thelma is a superstar.

But what’s the story actually about? Let me break it down in five easy-to-digest points:

1. Thelma is BFFs with a donkey named Otis, but she’s getting kind of tired of her life – she wants to be more fabulous than a regular pony. She wants to be a unicorn (Otis, for the record, thinks she’s great as she is).
2. Thelma finds a carrot and straps it on her head like a unicorn horn. She then gets sprayed by pink paint and glitter in a freak pink-paint-and-glitter-carrying-truck accident.
3. Thelma becomes famous! Fabulous! She is the unicorn she always dreamed she’d be.
4. Unfortunately, with great fame comes great stress. Her fans are kind of crazy and Thelma realizes that some of them are actually jerks. She isn’t happy being super-popular and really misses Otis. She decides to change from unicorn back to pony.
5. Thelma returns home and is super-happy to see her BFF. Her life is pretty great after all.

I like many things about this book, including:

1. The art – it’s super-cute and I love, love, love the design of Thelma. The sparkly text on the front cover is fabulous.

2. The rhyming – I’m a sucker for a rhyming book, it’s true. This one is pretty solid. There’s only one page that makes me sort of cringe…it’s this part: “And some were not her fans at all. No some were really mean. And some did just the meanest things she’d really ever seen.” I have issues with the whole “really ever seen” thing. It feels forced and a bit awkward. It reminds me of Giraffes Can’t Dance – I have a similar issue with part of that book.

3. The moral of the story. I read this to Vivi and asked her “So what did you think?” And she said (and this is a direct quote): “I think the take-home message has to be to just be true to yourself. You can’t be happy if you’re being someone else. You have to be comfortable with who you are.” Boom! Any picture book that nails that message home to my five (almost six) year old is a total winner

If you’re looking for a book that appears to be all about being sparkly and pink but is really about something much, much deeper, pick up Thelma. You’re gonna love her.

Mama’s review: 4/5 sparkly horns
Vivi’s review: “Total A+”

Title: Crankenstein
Author: Samantha Berger
Illustrator: Dan Santat
Published: Scholastic, 2013

If you’ve been reading this blog at all, you’ll know that I am a *huge* Dan Santat fan. Like, massive. My favourite picture book of all (After the Fall) is 100% Dan-Santat-created, and I truly love everything else he’s done. You better believe I’m a Fantat (Fantat copyright Jess, 2018).

Anyway, Vivi brought home her Scholastic book order in October and I found a book that Mr. Santat illustrated. One I hadn’t heard of (and therefore didn’t own). Crankenstein. I promptly ordered it and waited.

I thought maybe I’d review it for Halloween. But life happened. (Read: Vivi has had pneumonia and we’ve been house-bound and away from school for TWO WEEKS.) The first afternoon back, Vivi’s (amazing) teacher had a large box of books for us. Among them: Crankenstein. I’m not gonna lie, I read it in the car in the driveway.

It’s the tale of a cranky little boy who turns into a Crankenstein (that’s a wonderful portmanteau of ‘cranky’ and ‘Frankenstein,’ of course) whenever there’s an uncomfortable/difficult situation. You know, like all kids do. When waiting in line, when having to deal with a dearth of maple syrup, when having a toy break or a popsicle melt or having to take horrible medicine (relatable!).

The story is simple but cute. But, as per usual, Dan Santat’s art is what makes this book really special. My favourite page of all is the one where the two Crankensteins meet and are glaring at each other. It is SO accurate. It’s EXACTLY what kids look like.

This book is definitely for the younger-end of the picture book age group. Vivi is “meh” on it (her words), but Lily likes it and has asked for it a few times. It would be a good one to have for a preschool/JK class for Halloween…a good way to tie in the special occasion and talk about how we can all be a bit monstrous sometimes.

And, as a hilarious side note: if you own this book, please read the legal page. Dan Santat has written a description of how the art was produced for the story. My favourite line is: “Crankenstein is the embodiment of Dan Santat’s pure rage…and he did it all for you.” Thanks, Dan!

Mama’s review: 4 cranky kids/5
Vivi: Meh.
Lily: “I like it!”

Title: Bunny Cakes
Author/Illustrator: Rosemary Wells
Published: Puffin Books, 1997

I used to tutor a little boy who loved, loved, loved Max and Ruby. Whenever we’d go to the library for our weekly book haul, we’d comb the shelves for any new Rosemary Wells books. And, failing that, we’d just renew the ones we were bringing back. We did this for about 3 years.

I read a LOT of Max and Ruby, is what I’m saying.

I also ended up sewing my little charge Max and Ruby dolls. But that’s another story.

I figured, when I had kids, that they might also like Max and Ruby. And they do. Kinda.

My 5 year old, Vivi, informed me that Bunny Cakes is now “too babyish” for her (she loved it when she was 2-3 and we read it almost daily, but now that she’s nearly 6, it’s just not her speed anymore). 3 year old Lily is still a fan, however, so I’m only posting her review at the end.

Basically, Bunny Cakes is about brother-and-sister rabbits Max and Ruby preparing a birthday dessert for their grandma. (AKA: the only grownup who ever appeared in any of their books/TV shows until recently when the writers realized that it’s SUPER WEIRD not to have adults in a TV show. Looking at you too, Ryder and Paw Patrol.)

So Grandma has taken another trip around the sun. Max wants to get some Red-Hot Marshmallow Squirters to decorate her cake with. Ruby just needs to replenish all the ingredients Max constantly spills/wrecks. Max takes Ruby’s written requests for eggs/milk/flour to the grocery store and tries to add his own “Red-Hot Marshmallow Squirters” addendum each time. Only on his last visit to get Ruby some cake decorations does he DRAW (as opposed to illegibly scribble) Red-Hot Marshmallow Squirters on the list and voila – he gets his candy!

Max and Ruby then present Grandma with two cakes and Gran can’t figure out which one to eat first (pro tip: eat the one without the caterpillar guts for frosting).

So I like this book. It’s funny, it’s cute, the art is always good when it comes from Rosemary Wells. And it’s about cake. If you know me, you know that’s a selling feature.

Mama’s Review: 4/5 buttercream roses
Lily’s Review: “I like it so much, you should read it again!”