The Legend of Rock, Paper, Scissors
Author: Drew Daywalt
Illustrated by: Adam Rex
Published: Balzer & Bray, 2017

If you know me personally, you’ve probably tried to pay for coffee at some point in our relationship. And since I can’t let things be easy, I’ve probably turned your kind gesture into a niceness war.

The script goes something like this:
Me: No, let me get it.
You: No, I’d be happy to.
Me: My treat this time, for real.
You: No, no, it’s mine.

And so forth.

And if this has happened, you know that the only way to end a niceness war is by starting another conflict: I’m talking rock, paper, scissors. To the death (actually, best 2/3).

Today’s story is all about the origins of rock, paper, scissors. It starts with a warrior named Rock. He lives in the Backyard Kingdom and he is undefeated in battle. My favourite line of the book happens in this part of the story. (Rock encounters an apricot and says “You, sir, look like a fuzzy little butt.”) Rock defeats the apricot (of course) and then leaves the kingdom in search of a more worthy adversary.

Next, we join the adorable (and somewhat reminiscent of Spongebob SquarePants) Paper. Paper lives in the Mom’s Home Office Empire. And, like Rock, Paper is undefeatable. Paper decides, after slaying a printer (with a paper jam) and a half-eaten bag of trail mix (by blocking out the sun) to move on and find an opponent who really puts up a fight.

Finally, we meet Scissors. Scissors lives in the kitchen and she battles all kinds of interesting characters (tape, dinosaur-shaped-frozen-nuggets). After vanquishing her enemies, she decides to leave the kitchen and find someone who is strong enough to fight her.

Everyone ends up meeting in the garage. And then Scissors takes on Rock. Rock wins (again). But wait…Paper shows up and BEATS ROCK! And then Scissors takes on Paper and she wins! So everyone feels the joy of winning and of finally being beaten by someone who is a superior warrior.

And this is why we now play Rock, Paper, Scissors – to honour the great warriors.

There are five things I love about this book:

1. The art. Adam Rex, you’re fast becoming one of my favourite illustrators. I loved Nothing Rhymes With Orange, and I love this one too. My favourite character is Rock. I want a doorstop that looks like him.
2. The personality of the characters. The dialogue is really funny and the situations the characters find themselves in are excellent.
3. The premise: everyone knows Rock, Paper, Scissors! Creating a story around their conflict is such a clever idea. One I wish I had thought of first!
4. The story is not short, but it doesn’t feel overly long. It’s really well-written. (Fun note: Drew Daywalt wrote The Day the Crayons Quit and The Day the Crayons Came Home. Those books are also really fun to read/excellent.)
5. The pacing is right-on. It’s fast-paced and exciting. My kiddos loved it.

The art is superb. The story is hilarious. We are definitely getting a copy for our bookshelf.

Mama’s Review: A+
Vivi’s Review: “Scissors was my favourite.”
Lily’s Review: “Fuzzy little butt! Haha!”